Alex met her first, which makes a lot of sense. Jack called him late one night over Xmas break and said they needed a ride from the bar. And then the next morning the three of them went out to get bagels for breakfast.

I, of course, grilled Alex for his impression.

“They seem to really like each other,” he said. “And I was worried Jack would act different around her, but then he was singing Lorde really loud in the car and I was like, oh, he’s just Jack.”

From there the plan was to have brunch together and meet her at the end of the month, but she and Jack ended up making a quick stop at the house to pick something up. So we met her then. Alex had a bunch of friends over, who couldn’t stop talking about how pretty she was after she had left.

“I’m gonna shake Jack Nuckols’ hand!” one of them said.

And then the ice was broken, I guess. 

Her name is Amya (pronounced a-my-a). They met through a friend of a friend, and ended up out at the same bar a few times, and eventually started…Hanging out? Talking? Dating? There are distinct steps in a relationship, but I still don’t totally get it. I do know Jack officially asked her to be his girlfriend a few months ago and that seems like a milestone of sorts. He spends the night at her place about two nights a week (she lives a few towns over).

They decided to stay at our house for the big snowstorm last weekend. We have a fireplace in case the heat went off, plus we’re closer to Amya’s work. So we had them both here for a good 48 hours.

The Sunday of the snowstorm came and the two of them didn’t come up out of the basement until 4PM. Jack wanted to play games, so we broke out Skip-Bo and Monopoly (card version), and we spent a couple hours having a lot of fun. Then they sat on couch and watched football while Shani and I made Italian Wedding Soup. We had dinner together, and then watched more football. We got into a deep debate about who would win in a fight: Me or a female Olympic gymnast?

Then my birthday was Wednesday, and Amya joined us for my celebratory dinner out (chicken wings, baby!).

Really, there’s only one problem.

This guy.

Ozzie loves his people. So when Jack and Amya were sitting cuddled on the couch, Ozzie stood right in front of them and stared at Jack. Then he started to let out an occasional yap. Then finally, he climbed up on the couch and wedged himself in between them.

Later, Jack and Amya were playing a card game on the floor. Ozzie came over and sat down right on Amya’s cards. Then he stuck his face at her and demanded to be pet. She gave him some scratches under the chin for a while, until he decided he didn’t like that anymore and snarled at her.

So that’s an issue. But if we’re being honest…

Amya is a sweetheart. And Ozzie?

Ozzie is a dick.