It started with the Zac Brown Band. We were driving across Florida on Saturday and listening to “Florida Mix.” Jack was asleep in the passenger seat. Zac Brown was doing a Bob Marley cover (badly) with a Jamaican accent (very badly). So I switched to actual Bob Marley and all of a sudden the whole thing became real to me. We were less than 4 hours away from our 30th Major League Ballpark.
-STOP-
This is gonna be a long one. This is gonna tell about this trip, but it’s also gonna list all 30 ballparks, with photos. It will have our official ballpark rankings. It will even have Jack’s “I’d like to thank…” list.
This one is more for me than any readers. This is the culmination of where this blog started 13 years ago. This one will be the reference. This one will be the official jog of the memory for years to follow.
-REWIND A FEW DAYS-
We start in Tampa. Flight lands, get rental car, got to hotel…Oh my.
It was the Mari Jean Hotel, which I’d booked on Hotels.com. It was quite obviously a a hotel for gay men coming to party in St. Petersburg. It sat above a club called The COCKtail. (“Stiff drinks, hard liquor, raging good time.”)
Awesome. It was also within walking distance of Tropicana. Field. So we grabbed lunch, a few beers, and then met Danny Nolan!
Danny has been Jack’s best friend since they were 6. He is a math genius and sports nut. And in fulfillment with a destiny we all saw since he was whipping Jack at Strat-O-Matic — Danny now works for the Tampa Bay Rays. In fact, I credit their winning season to him.
And Danny hooked us UP! Seats, discounts on food, ballpark tour. But far better than all of that? We got to watch a game together, which Danny and Jack have done a million times.
I was actually trying to stay quiet and let myself disappear so I could watch the two of them.
They are quiet, non-performative friends and always have been. Boys’ friendships are usually about action and competition and oneupmanship. But as boys, these two would sit together without a hint of drama and spend entire afternoons plotting out the rosters for the Phillies and Yankees five years in the future. They’d laugh at inside jokes that no else could possibly understand. They needed no entertaining whatsoever. Their friendship was (and still is) deeply held and almost invisible to the naked eye. I guess that’s why I tried to draw back at the Rays game. I wanted to watch their friendship, and you have to really look for it to see it.
And watching them watch a baseball game is truly seeing them in their most natural habitat.
Then onto Miami. Zac Brown to Bob Marley to the Miami Vice theme song (I literally played it) to the Arlo Wynwood Hotel.
More spacious. Less homoerotic. We go up to our room and…
“I’ve got eyes on the stadium!” Jack announced.
And I stop to recognize that for stadium hunters, this is a thing. Whether it’s from the car, the street, or the hotel window — the moment you spot the stadium is a milestone of the process.
We had lunch in the hotel. And at this point — this is insane what I’m about to say — but it was a little like the morning of my wedding day. I was aware of every small detail and I kept thinking: In just a few hours, I will have visited all 30 ballparks. I mean, we’ve been at this since 2010, since Jack was 7. This was 16 years in the making. 16 years of planning and dreaming and chattering and imagining.
We got a Lyft and then walked around to the gate, through security, got our tickets scanned. Doors.
Escalator.
Ballpark.
–
–
–
–
We embraced and Jack cried a little. I went to the bathroom a cried a little when I heard Centerfield over the speakers.
And then we did our thing.
We walked around. We got T-shirts. We checked out the views and food options. We even got special pins from guest services.
Then we sat in left field and watched a ballgame.
We headed out as the game came to an end. And then what always happens, happened.
We’ve done dozens of these trips, and we’ve learned that the best part is always what happens around the ball parks. The dim sum palace in Chicago. The Bucks winning the NBA championship while we were in Milwaukee. Playing catch in a hotel parking lot. Candy apples and badminton in Mike Tucker’s back yard.
This time it was Bill Kelley’s golf cart tour and a long, joyful lunch in Miami. Then Bill and Juan came over to our hotel and we spent three hours hanging out at the roof top pool. Time opened up and there we were soaking in unplanned magic.
This journey has been so much more than seeing stadiums. It’s seeing people we love. It’s them meeting Jack at different stages of his life. It’s bringing my son to interact with friends like another adult at the table until he quite literally has become another adult at the table. It has been pockets of magic and love and joy, made ten times the better because I’ve shared them with my son. Dear God, the blessing that is my life is sometimes hard to believe.
I sit and type these words absolutely swamped with gratitude for everyone who has touched these trips. This is not a log of ballparks. It is a log of love.
So let’s do this. Here is the log of the entire journey.
Official NuckolBall Ballpark Timeline
We put this list together in two different bars.
It will be presented chronologically. Each entry will include our word association for each ballpark, then some extra things associated with the ballpark.
We will also include some photos.
2005
Trenton Thunder
Jack: “Thunder chicken”
Mike: “The Beginning”
Additional Notes: Alex was due any minute. Myself, Shani’s Dad, and a 2-year-old Jack went to see the Trenton Thunder. Jack loved and feared the bird mascot. But most of all, he laid eyes on a baseball field. Even then you could see the impact.
2008
1. Philadelphia Phillies
Jack: “Stanton BP ball”
Mike: “Mushed with Don Roufa”
Additional Notes: Flexcam. Baseball Gods. We have been to this park many times over the years. Our first time was with our friends the Mulvihill/Younts and it was rained out. This is also the best park for getting a ball.
2009
2. Yankees Stadium
Jack: “Jeter“
Mike: “Didi Home Run“
Additional Notes: Stoned. Game of Thrones. Dominguez. Perfection. Rivera. Heaven.
Arkansas Naturals
Not an MLB park, but on a visit to stay with their grandparents, the boys had an incredible time at this park. It is part of the history.
2010
3. Nationals Stadium (the quest for 30 officially begins)
Jack: “First park. And Being Cold.”
Mike: “Mike M-Fin’ Tucker“
2011
4. Rogers Center (Toronto Blue Jays)
Jack: “Mary M-Fin’ Poplawski“
Mike: “Mary to the Rescue“
Additional Notes: One of the best games we’ve ever seen. Watching “Major League” in the hotel gym.
2012
5. Busch Stadium (St. Louis Cardinals)
Jack: “Rain Delay Fake out“
Mike: “Arch“
Additional Notes: We were, of course, with Jack’s grandparents for this one.
2013
6. PNC Park (Pittsburgh Pirates and NuckolBall blog officially begins)
Jack: “Catch in the hotel parking lot“
Mike: “Pot roast nachos“
Additional Notes: This remains our #1 ballpark.
2014
7. Citi Field (New York Mets)
Jack: “Alex throws up at rest stop“
Mike: “Autographs“
Additional Notes: Subway series
8. Progressive Field (Cleveland Indians/Guardians)
Jack: “Drummer“
Mike: “Wall of shade“
Additional Notes: Brat section. Covers Covers Covers.
2015
9. Great American Ball Park (Cincinnati Reds)
Jack: “Copeland-Johns“
Mike: “Brauhaus“
Additional Notes: Skyline Chili, being on the bridge, best exit strategy
2016
10. Dodgers Stadium
Jack: “Fight“
Mike: “Cat Fight“
11. Oracle Park (San Francisco Giants)
Jack: “Drunk guy“
Mike: “Drunk guy“
Additional Notes: Eduardo Nunez losing his helmet
2017
12. Kauffman Stadium (Kansas City Royals)
Jack: “Upgrade“
Mike: “Scoreboard“
Additional Notes: Highway in background
13. Coors Field (Colorado Rockies)
Jack: “Sydney Tatar“
Mike: “Tatars“
14. Camden Yards (Baltimore Orioles)
Jack: “Hungover“
Mike: “Dap hats“
Additional Notes: Judge signed ball. Seafood dinner Jonathan Schoop
2018
15. SunTrust Stadium (Atlanta Braves)
Jack: “Longest at-bat ever“
Mike: “Traffic“
Additional Notes: Grandparents
2019
16. Comerica Park (Detroit Tigers)
Jack: “Midwestern Ladies“
Mike: “Pink Visors“
17. Wrigley Field (Chicago Cubs)
Jack: “Engagement“
Mike: “Trumpet“
Additional Notes: Cold front
2021
18. Guaranteed Rate Field (Chicago White Sox)
Jack: “Dim sum“
Mike: “Nirvana“
Additional Notes: Pure zone
19. American Family Field (Milwaukee Brewers)
Jack: “Bucks win the finals“
Mike: “Scooters“
Additional Notes: Pure zone continued
2022
20. Fenway Park (Boston Red Sox)
Jack: “Slap ass“
Mike: “Explaining game to Brits“
Additional Notes: Seeing Matt
21. T-Mobile Park (Seattle Mariners)
Jack: “Seattle fans“
Mike: “View“
2023
22. Target Field (Minnesota Twins)
Jack: “Brick work“
Mike: “Chris Nuckols“
Additional Notes: Prince
23. Oakland Coliseum (Athletics)
Jack: “Trough urinals“
Mike: “Concrete“
2024
24. Chase Field (Arizona Diamondbacks)
Jack: “Women’s NCAA Finals“
Mike: “Echoey“
2025
25. Petco Park (San Diego Padres)
Jack: “Budzik Kambucha“
Mike: “Brotherhood“
26. Angel Stadium
Jack: “Food“
Mike: “Food/Frank“
2026
27. Daikin Park (Houston Astros)
Jack: “Mom falling asleep“
Mike: “Joey Loperfido (and Shani)“
28. Globe Life Field (Texas Rangers)
Jack: “Penis, Texas“
Mike: “Obstructed view“
29. Tropicana Field (Tampa Bay Rays)
Jack: “Danny“
Mike: “Danny“
Additional Notes: Short rib grilled cheese
30. LoanDepot Park (Miami Marlins)
Jack: “Autistic kid“
Mike: “Centerfield playing at the urinal“
Additional Notes: 30!!
Official NuckolBall Ballpark Rankings
After hitting all 30 ballparks (some multiple times), we present you with the official rankings. Ballparks are broken in “tiers.”
Legendary Tier: Wrigley Field, Fenway Park
A Tier: PNC Park, AT&T Park, T-Mobile Park, Great American Ballpark, Citizens Bank Park, Petco Park
B Tier: Camden Yards, Comerica Park, Rogers Centre, Kauffman Stadium, Guaranteed Rate Field, American Family Field, Angels Stadium, Daikin Field
C Tier: Yankee Stadium, Citi Field, Progressive Field, Coors Field, Busch Stadium, Target Field, LoanDepot Park
D Tier: Dodgers Stadium, Nationals Park, Chase Field, Truist Park, Globe Life Field, Tropicana Field
F Tier: O. Co Coliseum
We’d like to thank…
And finally, Jack’s list of people we would like to thank for being part of this incredible journey.
MLB Ballparks: Credits
Mike Tucker
Harry Nuckols and Mary Motherf–kin Paplowski
The Copeland-Johns
A Number of Beatties
A Number of DeMottes
The Tatars
Coddy and Mary Nuckols
Frank Beltran
Mike Budzik and Co.
Wade and NOT Corbin (he’ll get a second chance in Vegas)
The Harris’s
Chris Nuckols (and Prince)
Bill and Juan
Nicole Barnes
Bob and Joan Gallagher
And so, so many more that have made each of these trips something uniquely special. Not just for accomodating us, but for making a meaningful effort to be a part of the journey.
With that in mind, there are those in who deserve more than name recognition…
Assorted Best Friends (Cris Reifsteck, Daniel Nolan, Christopher DiMedio and Max Kolo)
When I was six, I would take a wiffle bat and a tennis ball out into the street and pretend I was a professional baseball player. I’d hit imaginary triples, steal imaginary bases, turn imaginary double plays. And, right beside imaginary Jack Nuckols, was imaginary Danny Nolan, Chris DiMedio and Max Kolo, making imaginary plays in all 30 of these ballparks. The transcendent feeling of walking into each of them for the first time is not the same without them.
The Covers
The number of people across the country who are willing to take us in is an achievement in itself. One, however, stands out. The Covers have been with us every step of the way, from our first trip to Cleveland to our long trips out west, the road always went through Shaker Heights. I think we broke into their home in the name of baseball once.
Don and Eileen Roufa (and the Thunder Chicken)
We always talk about how special Midwest baseball is, and while it is special, a large part of that magic is that it reminds me of Grandma and Pop.
It’s possible you’re where it all started. I love you guys and I love that you love baseball.
Alex Nuckols
I often forget that our quest was a three-man journey for a long time. I appreciate Alex for A) Holding on as long as he did and, when the Dip N Dots were no longer worth it, B) admitting it was time to bow out.
And with ballpark food still playing as large a role in our ranking system as it does, his legacy goes on.
Shani Nuckols
When I say this doesn’t happen without her, I mean it literally. About 70% of the people that took us in were Mom’s friends. But that’s not the half of it. It’s one thing to have that many friends, and another thing for all them to be so damn great. Not that I’m surprised. As I said in Texas, “quality attracts quality” and all the incredible people that made each trip so unique are reflections of how incredible Mom is. Then again, so are most of the things she touches, including tolerating an inhumane amount of baseball over the past 20 years.
NuckolBall 
Leave a comment